#368 The Art of Coaching with Brett Bartholomew

Brett Bartholomew joins Matt & Niki to discuss the art of coaching: what is coaching and how to do it more effectively. Brett is the author of Conscious Coaching, and you can find out more about Brett & his work here.

https://www.youtube.com/user/chewybjj
https://www.chewjitsu.net/

SHOW NOTES

Consider experience versus exposure. Experience requires skin in the game. You might have exposure to lifting and ideas around coaching or business, but do you have experience doing it. An example might be the difference between criticizing podcasts versus doing a podcast yourself or coaching versus criticizing a coaching methodology.

Brett works with professional athletes and has developed a knack & reputation for working with “difficult” athletes. He enjoyed the challenge and honing his communication and connection skills with these athletes.

An important note, that applies to all coaches and really all professionals, showing your client how smart you are doesn’t mean you’re coaching them well: this doesn’t lead to effectiveness or connection. You need to build buy-in and trust. While technique coaching and intelligent, personalized programming are great, they aren’t enough.

A point of discussion here is public versus private sector. Consider D1 athletes or military service members as opposed to people paying you to receive coaching. The former have to show up and work as part of their job. The latter can quit at any time, and only continue if they want to.

This leads to Brett’s ideas of commitment, compliance, or resistance. To create these categories, you need to consider the task and relationship in the situation. Is the relationship good or bad? Does the client appreciate or like the task or not? If both are bad, you get resistance. If both are good, you get commitment. If you relationship is good but they don’t buy in with the task, you get compliance.

Another factor as a coach is that one-size-fits-all doesn’t work. There are different types of clients and athletes (and, again, there’s variation within, but categorization aids understanding). There are also coaching types, so you have to know your preferences and tendencies. Most people learn how to coach through a combination of how they were coached and their perception of what is successful (what they observe).When coaching the world-class or professional, you have to consider the difference between behaviors and traits and how they apply to their domain of excellence. Behaviors can be situational (potentially in the case of a world class athlete). Traits stay consistent. If you are truly world class at something, you will be narcissistic in that domain, whereas if you have a narcissistic trait that remains consistent throughout your domains of life.
Brett also discusses some struggles he went through when he was younger with overexercising & also finding a way to connect through Dr. Katie.He both wanted to avoid his home life and his friends who began doing hard drugs. He came to compulsively exercise, and was sent to an institution oriented toward people with eating disorders. The treatment was similar to prison, where he had no privacy and no choice. During this time, he felt no connection with the supposed experts and professionals who were supposed to help him. He was even told, as his parting, “You’ll be back.”

Dr. Katie finally connected with him, showing him a way to help others and actually be effective in changing others’ behaviors.They end by discussing marketing: how do you ethically self-promote? Well, first, differentiation is critical. What is your brand? How do you communicate your value? If you haven’t thought about this, or think this is below you, you still have a brand and are still communicating your value, though not doing so consciously.

This episode touches business and health, coaching and personal growth, and the personal and professional. Check it out.

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